Commit to Under Commit

Life PyramidOne of the saddest things about life is the fact that we are the only ones to blame for how crazy our life is. I see many many of my friends overwhelmed with busy schedules so much so that they scarcely have time to spend in solid Bible study, reading, and prayer with God. There is no time to meet with friends, no ability to “pop over” for tea. No time to help out when a sister is in need. All because we have mistakenly chased after the things the world tells us we need to chase after.

I get it. We are all busy especially this time of year. Martin Luther used to say when he had a busy day he would get up an extra hour early to get in 2 hours of Bible study and prayer in but when he had an extra busy day ahead of him and he knew he was barely going to be able to fit it all in he would get up 2 hours early to spend 3 hours with The LORD.

Spending 3 hours with God in the morning may seem unrealistic but my conscience bears witness against it being unrealistic. My spirit tells me I need to do as much as I can to be in the Word. Below are some of the potential lies we have eaten hook, line, and sinker (think about that phrase for a sec.) You have swallowed EVERY BIT of the lie. While the items on the below list are not inherently bad, some are, in fact, quite good, you need to check who you are serving and what your motives are for doing them. The things the world wants you to serve or God?

God comes first, then your husband, then your kids, then your family, then your church family, then your co-workers, and on down the line. This is not about hours in your day, of course you need to work 8-9 hours a day. This is about who you are and your priorities. Click on the Green Pyramid and read the things we should focus on when we interact with different people in our lives. God and prayer should be a part of every one. Consider if you are trapped in any of the following areas and how you can lighten your load.

  • Making sure every kid is involved in a sport or even two. (What happened to playing outside with the neighbors and staying out until the street lights come on?)
  • Thinking the right thing to do to enrich your child is an after school program. (I know you could come up with something to help enrich them.)
  • Signing up to volunteer for everything you can (PTA, CHURCH, YMCA, you name it)
  • Working away from home. (I know some of you are not going to like this one, but this is straight from the Bible.)
  • Signing up for this activity or that activity to fill your time. (Quite time and hours spent alone with God are soooo important.)
  • Filling up every weekend with stuff to do. (Try making sure at least one or two weekends a month are free and clear, you never know what appointments God has for you.)

All this leads to being overwhelmed. I encourage you to ruthlessly edit your life. Stop carving out time for God and make him the largest section of your waking hours Life Pyramid. Resolve to commit to under commit.

by Jen O’Sullivan (also featured on Linked Cycling Women)

DBR Thought of the Day ~ Love your Wife, Respect your Husband (Ephesians 5:33)

“let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” – Ephesians 5:33

Can it really be that simple? Husbands, love your wives. Wives, respect your husbands. Oddly it sort of is. Women have a basic need to be loved and men have a basic need to be respected. In Dr. Emerson Eggerichs’ book Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs he goes into great detail about how this works. I highly recommend buying a copy and trying out what he suggests. It may just save your marriage, or at least it will enhance your marriage greatly. Below is a snippet I pulled from Michael Hyatt’s review on the book. You can see what he had to say here.

Emerson uses two acronyms to explain to men and women how to provide what their partner needs. To the men, he uses the acronym of C-O-U-P-L-E to remind them what their wives need. This is how you spell love to your wife:

  • Closeness—She wants you to be close.
  • Openness—She wants you to open up to her.
  • Understanding—Don’t try to fix her; just listen.
  • Peacemaking—She wants you to say, “I’m sorry.”
  • Loyalty—She needs to know you’re committed.
  • Esteem—She wants you to honor and cherish her.

To the women, he uses the acronym of C-H-A-I-R-S to remind them what their husbands needs. This is how you spell respect to your husband:

  • Conquest—Appreciate his desire to work and achieve.
  • Hierarchy—Appreciate his desire to protect and provide.
  • Authority—Appreciate his desire to serve and to lead.
  • Insight—Appreciate his desire to analyze and counsel.
  • Relationship—Appreciate his desire for shoulder-to-shoulder friendship.
  • Sexuality—Appreciate his desire for sexual intimacy.

I have read the book and tried out a lot of what Eggerichs suggests. To put it simply, buy showing my husband respect and actually telling him that I respect him has made a huge difference in our relationship.

“let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” – Ephesians 5:33

Maranatha!

~ Jen O’Sullivan
www.HolyJustLove.com