It is the Fall. We, as moms, tend to do it all. We wear all sorts of hats from PTA, to AWANA, to Room Mom, to wife, to mom, to daughter, to full-time employee, to boss, to soccer coach, to chef, I mean really, we DO. IT. ALL. Why? No one ever told us we had to do that. My friend Becca once said something that resonated with me. She said when her hubby or anyone else for that matter gets on her case about not getting something done she simply and smartly says, “I’m only one woman.”
When did we decide that we needed to wear the pants in the family? When did we decide that we wanted to be a full-time mom, full-time employee, and a full-time crazy lunatic? Oh yes! Now I remember: it was AT THE FALL!!! The FALL!!! Man!! What on earth were WE thinking? And when I say the collective “WE” I mean EVE. Honestly, if you were her, you would have done the same thing. Don’t give me the line “If I were Eve I would not have eaten the fruit!” That is just not true and you know it.
The thing that makes me giggle is that we THINK we all know what the curse was, right? The sad crafty deceiver animal, whatever he was before hand, now has to slither on his belly and eat dust all the days of his life. There would also be this continual struggle between Satan and humans. Yep, we get that. The men had to now work the land by the sweat of their brow. He would have to really WORK to get anywhere in life. And sad sad women. What did we get? Increased pain in childbirth. I can handle that! Anyone can handle that. We’ve got epidurals now. Woohoo! We got off easy!
Not so fast! There is oooonnnneeee little teeeeeny weeeeeny curse that God gave us that somehow we have all managed to have amnesia about. Do you remember what it was? Think REAL hard now. Nope, nothing, right? Let’s take a look, shall we?
To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be for your husband,
and he shall rule over you.”
(Genesis 3:16 ESV)
What does that mean that our desire will be for my husband and he will rule over us? Let’s find out.
The Hebrew word for desire is tĕshuwqah which means just that, to desire or crave something as in longing for it or reaching out for it. The next word in that sentence is ‘iysh which just means “man”. The third word is mashal which means to rule or have dominion over.
I think too often we misunderstand what is being said here. We think that means that we will desire our husbands and he will be the head of the household. That is not what this verse is saying. More accurately, when you think in context of this being a curse and when you read those words one by one without putting other words in there, we will desire after men but they will still rule over us. We will desire to be LIKE them.
Think about that now historically. Women have time and time again tried to be men. From scandalously wearing pants, to acting like men, to wanting to do their jobs. We are women! We can do it all! Hear me roar!
I am sorry, but I am tired of trying to be a man. I. AM. A. WOMAN! And I am beautiful! I want to BE a woman, not a man. I want what God wants for me! He designed me differently. I am more emotional. I love connecting with people. I like to chat with people. I want to help others. I am naturally a nurturing person. The areas I stumble on are the areas I stupidly decided to think I could do better than my husband, or any man for that matter.
Consider this. Men are not better than women. Women are not better than men. Just like ice is not better than water. They are just DIFFERENT. Both are necessary to get the job done. Honor that. Be who God wants you and designed you to be. Stop trying to do everything. Raise your babies. Be a helper to your husband. Don’t try to control everything or be everything or do everything. You will only find true balance in your life when you find God’s balance for your life. I promise you. If you do it God’s way, you will be blessed beyond anything you could ever have imagined!